The Critic's Conundrum

Local film critic Dominic Corry has written a pretty good piece on something that's been on my mind - and no doubt others in the same occupational shoes - for some time now: should we treat NZ films any different to films produced elsewhere? The answer is obviously no, and has been for me ever since I started reviewing films in a professional capacity. But the fact is we're such a small country, and these words don't have to travel very far before someone in the industry takes it personally and starts crying/moaning about it. And as such, it's left me with a complete lack of desire to review anything locally made (plus the fact there's so little that's being made that I actually want to watch *oooh buurrrn*). I shouldn't be affected by it but I'm only human and it's a reality I've often come to wrestle with. It's the same deal with any creative field - whether it's music or art - if your friend's band sucks hard, what are you going to say? "Sorry, you guys are crap"? (tip: "It's not really my thing", or "You guys are tight" seem to work okay to deflect the bad taste they might leave in your mouth).

Anywho just go read Dom's article, it sheds much-needed light on the NZ film critic-vs-NZ films issue and the role of the film critic. For the record I have not seen Sione's Wedding 1 or 2.

Make My Movie Finalists Announced

The 12 finalists for the Make My Movie competition have been revealed. They were culled from 730 entries (!), no easy task I imagine - but from seeing the sheer number of head-slapping, WTF pitches I'd say it also wasn't too hard to pinpoint the contenders. For what it's worth, here's my loosey-goosey rundown of the finalists:

NEVER FORGET
Poster: Fantasy, adult-fairy-tale graphic novel by a 16-year-old girl? I dunno.
Idea: My initial thought was it was some kind of non-PC Harold and Kumar deal (incompetent slackers...), but the synopsis ends up reading darker ("brutal kidnapping"). The one-location setting and real-time approach are ambitious, budget-conscious decisions, but it's going to need some solid perfs and smart, convincing writing to pull its premise off.
Verdict: Nope.

THE BACH
Poster: Eye-catching perspective/image, wide open spaces = sense of mystery, possibility.
Idea: Limited location/characters works for the budget. Sergeant Dave sounds like a great meaty role. Interesting shifting dynamics between characters could fuel some tense moments, but will need to be super persuasive and not turn into a turgid chamber drama.
Verdict: Maybe.

THIS PAPIER MACHE BOULDER IS ACTUALLY  REALLY HEAVY
Poster: That typeface has got to go.
Idea: Fun fantasy concept, if not entirely original. Could see this as a winning, charming lo-fi comedy if done right. Want to see what they do with the costumes and sets on a shoe-string. Getting a Bill & Ted/Galaxy Quest meets Michel Gondry/Special Problems feel.
Verdict: Potential.

BLUE VEIN
Poster: Off-putting. What is that? Ecoli?
Idea: Maybe it's the poster, which doesn't even begin to give you an idea of the story's tone or anything, or maybe it's the thought of blue cheese and porn in the same picture... but this smells like misfire to me.
Verdict: Nope.

HOW TO MEET GIRLS FROM A DISTANCE
Poster: I get it, but needs work.
Idea: Has there been a creepy stalking rom-com before? I can't think of one off the top of my head. This could be a goer. Mass crowd appeal because we're all stalkers at heart.
Verdict: Potential.

KILL BY MOUTH
Poster: First thoughts: The Invisible Man/The Tenant/Timecrimes.
Idea: This kind of hallucinatory brain-melt plot is usually up my alley but hard to gauge if this is tongue-in-cheek or not ("drinking endless pina coladas"). Intriguing to say the least, and there aren't enough movies with hypnotists around. Not really fond of that title aye.
Verdict: Maybe.

NUMBER 8 WIRE
Poster: Torturrrre porrrnn.
Idea: Like The Bach, title is unmistakably NZ. Do we really need a Kiwi Deliverance or Rituals? It'll need to bring some fresh to the table. Dig the MacGyer quote, hope they can come up with some cool make-shift contraptions.
Verdict: Maybe.

THE HELMET
Poster: Nice, clean.
Idea: Source Code-y high concept that sounds like a tired Twilight Zone gimmick, but if it can produce some serious laughs and nifty twists, then I'd like to see them.
Verdict: Maybe.

DOWNHILL
Poster: Looks like a sports flick with a phantom angry face seeping through the paper.
Idea: I can go with 4 girls on mountain bikes, but the rest of it sounds a bit rote. Broken leg, no cell phone reception, etc. Actually if you had the 4 girls on mountain bikes vs the Number 8. wire dude that would be the ideal pic.
Verdict: Nah.

TAXI TAPES
Poster: Oh dear.
Idea: A haunted taxi cab.
Verdict: Do not want.

SEX PRIEST
Poster:  I actually would love to see a poster with the words "SEX PRIEST" in the lobby of Event Cinemas.
Idea: Bad Santa but with a priest? Taboo-busting, irreverent comedy could be quite something if they can make it work (I can't imagine how at this stage) - but sounds like it has a sweet twist to it as well.
Verdict: Maybe.

FOLEY
Poster: Slick. Minimal. Striking.
Idea: A profession rarely seen on film so immediately fascinating. Thinking Rod Serling's Blow Out or The Conversation or something. Trick is whether writers can sustain the plot's central tease for an entire feature.
Verdict: Sure.